Three Lessons I Want My Children To Learn From Me

I like this topic! It’s quite different but it’s a thinker and I’ve worked out exactly what I want my kids to learn. I don’t really want kids, but if I ever change my mind, this is what they need to know. I could have a few stupidly obvious things, but I’ve decided on three different things that I’ve learnt throughout the years. God, I say years like I’m old, I’m still not 16 yet! Yikes. Anyway… on with it!

1. Life’s not fair, get used to it.

A quote pulled directly from my Dad’s getting-your-daughter-to-shut-up-dictionary. Ever since I can remember, if I’ve ever complained about something pretty miniscule, my Dad would say that phrase. When I was younger, I always thought it was really mean, but now I’m older [yep, still acting like I’m super old. This will almost definitely be a reoccurring theme], and (a smidge) wiser, I realised it’s actually true. Life sucks, man. Either you can moan and groan at every single small issue, or you can shut up and strive on. The only way for unimportant things to leave you alone, is to walk around them in your path of life. Get used to the small annoyances in life so you can face them all head on when you’re ready.

Slight side-note, but please appriciate that ever since these imaginary kids have appeared, I am acting like I’m some sort of a prophet/God. Is this what having kids does to you? Wow, I have so many questions!

2. Aspire for success, and don’t accept anything less.

Kind of a cute story behind this one. I was talking to someone about how shitty all my ex boyfriends were and he said this to me. Even though he meant it about partners, I feel like this applies to pretty much anything. I just love the idea of aiming high and achieving it, and I feel like these “words of wisdom” pretty much mean that you should never rest on your laurels, no matter how much easier that may be. You were bought here to achieve great things, so it’s only fair that you at least try.

3. Never shut up. It’ll be your greatest quality.

In my lifetime I have been called almost every slur in the book. All because I stand up for what I believe in. Make sure that if you believe in something so strongly, you will go to the ends of the earth to get your voice heard. As you grow older, your voice will merely become louder and those who try silence you are just jealous. Be proud of yourself, you’ve made it this far 🙂

What I Do To Help My Mental Health

So, in case you’re not aware, I suffer from anxiety, depression and PTSD.  It may sound like I’m trying to be a QuIrKy TeEnAgEr but I promise you I’m not, I’ve been diagnosed medically.  Anyway, because I’ve struggled with this for so long, I have a multitude of tips and tricks for how to ensure your mental health doesn’t dip.  Of course, everyone is different, but this is what works for me and I’m hoping it’ll work for you too.  These are also just general things to do to ensure you give yourself the self-love you deserve!  Also I’m so sorry I haven’t posted in a while, I wish I could say it was for a forgivable excuse but it was just because I was too obsessed with breaking bad… Oops.

  1. Do something you enjoy at least once a week.  Of course, everyone finds pleasure in different activities but something I find really relaxing is baking.  (I have pictures of some cupcakes I’ve decorated on my Instagram @TotallyTati which you should check out and follow – yes that was a shameless self-promo).  If baking isn’t your forte then you could do something such as swimming, dance, writing, drawing – whatever keeps you afloat!
  2. Keep on exercising!  As difficult as it may be to get out the house and it may seem quite ridiculous, it releases endorphins in your body which sets off – quite simply – positive vibes in your brain.  It doesn’t even need to be a large amount of exercise, just going out on a walk every so often will help you to get out the house and stay fit and healthy – double whammy!
  3. Keep a well-balanced healthy diet.  As extremely difficult as this may be – due to struggling with eating, the finance or whatever else – I promise this is essential.  I could go into all the science of it for you, but I doubt you want that so please just take my word for it
  4. Drink lots of water – Hydration is key!  Yet again, trust me on this.  Water is good.  Not lemonade, not coke, not squash, not flavoured water, just water.  Please just trust me on this one.
  5. Skincare routine.  It makes you feel organised, the results are amazing and it’s good for you!  If you want a full article on all the products and what I use, I’m more than happy to become a beauty blogger and explain to you what I use and what it’s for etc.
  6. Find a good TV show to binge watch!  For those lazy days where you can’t be bothered to socialise, or at the end of a long day, nothing beats getting nice and cosy and watching your favourite show.  It’s obviously to your taste what you watch but may I suggest if you want an addictive show, Breaking Bad is the way to go, if you want something light and funny, Brooklyn Nine Nine or Rick and Morty are my personal favourites.  Or if you want something cute and sweet, The US Office, Parks and Recreation and Friends will all be there for you.  Brainless reality TV more your thing?  Yummy Mummies is a hilarious way to switch off from the outside world and if you want talent and drama, RuPaul’s Drag Race is the show for you!  Whatever you want to watch, I’ve got you covered.
  7. Try something new.  This could be anything from starting an exercise class, to learning to draw or even learning how to make your favourite meal, it’s an amazing way to try new things and distract yourself.
  8. Create a happy wall.  Right, I am terrible at explaining things, but I’ll give it a go for you!  A happy wall is a great placed to put things that make you smile or – as you may be able to infer from the name – make you happy!  I’ve included photos of my friends, festival tickets, birthday cards, days out and whenever I look at it, I just can’t help but grin.  I have mine at the foot of my bed so it’s the first thing I see when I open my eyes and the last thing I see before I close them.
  9. Get a calendar.  For when those days do drag and you feel like it’s an endless cycle of darkness, it’s so helpful to have a calendar so you can tick off each day to prove to yourself you’re still here, kicking ass.
  10. Treat yourself once a month – or more!  It’s so lovely to do, self-love is the best love!  Whether that’s hanging out with friends, going to watch that movie you’ve been dying to see or even just putting on a face mask and dancing like no-one’s watching – whatever it is you deserve to treat yourself, you’re getting through the storm!  (This month I have two – a Halloween party AND I’m watching the Joker – beat that)
  11. Try stay on top of things as much as you can.  Whether that’s outfits, plans for the following days or even just homework, just try stay on top of it all.  You’ll thank yourself later, trust me.
  12. Switch off social media.  This is one I do not keep to, but I really should.  Loads of problems string from social media – I will be doing an article about that so stay tuned – and it’s just so lovely to switch off your phone and just have a ping free day.
  13. Organised space = Organised mind!  Yet another I do not stick to as much as I try.  It makes you feel better within yourself and it saves you from falling on your sorry butt after tripping over a bar of soap that you’re still not entirely sue how it got there… (Yes, I learnt from bitter experience)
  14. Buy some house plants.  It may sound like I’m being a crazy plant mum, which I am, it is very good for you!  It’s good for your commitment, they release oxygen and they’re overall good for the environment!  So become a plant mum, I have four plants which I call my children/babies much to my friends’ dismay
  15. Create a playlist.  Alongside being a plant mum, I’m also obsessed with music and I have a playlist for each mood I’m in – whether I feel happy, want to get hyped, need to calm down or want to be cheered up, I have a playlist for it!  And songs are cool so go mad my dudes.

So, there you have it!  15 ways to stop you feeling as rubbish as you do.  Of course, everyone is different, and you may feel differently about each thing but it’s still fun to try and if you have any more tips and tricks, feel free to comment them! (God, I really am turning into a cringy youtuber)

Anyway, I love you all, thanks for reading,

xo baby, Tati xoxo