My Blogiversary!

Today marks the iconic day in which Totally Tatiana was born.

A year ago today, if someone had told me I was on the road to recovery and I was working harder than ever before, I honestly would’ve just laughed in their faces. However, I’ve grown and developed a lot over the space of a year, and I just want to celebrate with you, my gorgeous readers, and say thank you for putting up with me for a whole year.

This year has flown by, but in many ways it feels like it’s dragged on which sucks. However, I have gained a small platform which is very exciting to me! I never normally stick at something for an extended period of time, but I do feel like I’ve found my passion – writing for all you guys!! In the short span of a year, I have managed to gain a niche audience, get my name placed on a list for best UK lifestyle bloggers, and I even have some devoted fans who always comment and like my articles.

All in all, I hope I’ve been one of the constants everyone’s needed over these past months.

I love you all, I’m so grateful!

xo baby, Tati xoxo

10 Weird Things I Do Which Other Teenagers Probably Don’t Do… [and the future of Totally Tatiana]

I feel like I am already confirmed to be a total quirky “I’m nOt lIkE OtHeR gIrLs” kinda gal. However, there are some strange things I do which are even further than edgy girl which make people slightly concerned for my wellbeing and overall sense of calm. My brain is a very dysfunctional, crazed place, but I wouldn’t change it for the world because it makes me, well, me! If any of you see one of these and think “haha, I do that” please let me know. It makes me feel slightly less crazy and shows me, and you, that you’re not alone. I do always say that, but I don’t think I’ve ever meant it in a type of “dude omg I do that too!! I thought I was the only one hahaha lmaoooo” kinda way, but we’re onto bigger and better things now! Please stick around until the end of this post so I can explain the future of Totally Tatiana – it’s kinda important!!


  1. I am insanely organised with the most miniscule things. I can’t just wing it, I must know exactly what’s going on, at all times. Even walking to school, I opened up a shared note so I can work out what times I’ll be meeting each of my friends. I have a small problem.
  2. I become emotionally attached to inanimate objects for no real reason. I don’t really know how I manage to do it, but I really think it’s just a strange talent I have for emotionally connecting with everything that merely breathes on this planet.
  3. I have a playlist for every song, mood, moment and occasion. Music is my life and I love it so much, it cheers me up, it comforts me, so it’s only fair that I have a song for every single moment of my uninteresting, boring life.
  4. I sing all the damn time – any time a lyric links up to what we’re saying, I’ll sing it, and probably create an impromptu dance alongside it. What can I say? You can take the kid out of the theatre but you can’t take the theatre out of the kid.
  5. I constantly steal my mates phones, just to take photos of myself on them, even though I have a fully functioning camera on my own, I prefer taking theirs. I am a very narcissistic person at times and this is my way of making sure you know I still exist and that you can’t escape me πŸ€ͺ
  6. Whenever I want to say hi to someone, I just wiggle my fingers at them like I’m casting a spell or something crazy like that. I used to do it with one hand but because I’m theatric I now use both hands, kind of like sideways jazz hands.
  7. I very aggressively use my arms when I’m excited. If you’re within arms length, there’s an increasingly high chance I will accidentally hurt you. That’s not your fault, it’s just me being expressive. I feel like most of these are just me explaining why I love performing arts, but we’ll allow it, this is my blog not yours😚
  8. I obsessively collect dinosaur memorabilia and I love it so much. I am a kid at heart and I think dinosaurs are my favourite thing ever created.
  9. Every-so-often, I just high kick while walking. It’s a fun thing to do and it’s my strange way of saying hi or BAM! Plus when I wear a skirt I feel like I need to dance.
  10. I love watching true crime documentaries and I find them super interesting. It’s also really helpful for my law A-Level as it provides extra context. Now we all know that I’m a sociopathic theatre kid, you can make up your own mind about what I’m really like!

the future…

Firstly, I just want to apologise for not posting loads. The 30 day challenge took a lot out of me and I needed time to just get away from writing for a while. Then, sixth form started, and, as much as I’m loving it, it’s a lot of work and it means I’m almost constantly busy.

For the future of this blog, of course I’m not going stop writing all together, I love this blog and it’s my baby. However, because I’m so busy, I’ll most likely end up writing fortnightly, so that I can try maintain my high quality!

As always, please say if you have any thoughts feelings, all that jazz! Thank you so much for reading, love you all,

xo baby, Tati xoxo

My GCSE Results!

The morning of the 20th August 2020 will definitely go down as one of the most panic inducing mornings in history. Why? It was the day of my GCSE results.

This year GCSE results were very different… for obvious reasons. The thing that stressed me out the most however, was the fact that we had no idea how we’d done. We only had mock papers from school to go on and that’s not the most accurate source of data.

On the night before the mocks, I lay awake panicking. I was on the phone to my friends until 4am because I simply couldn’t sleep, then only to get a grand total of two hours sleep that night. I was terrified. My whole life I’d had people telling me I’d never amount to anything and that I was a good for nothing whore. Even though that’s total bullshit, I felt like this was my one chance to prove them wrong.

All I was hoping was that I would pass five exams with at least a four; including English lit, English lang and maths. My actual results were better than I could’ve hoped for.


if you’re confused:

After my first set of mocks in January, I was predicted the following grades in each subject:

Citizenship: 5

Science: 4-3

English Language: 3

English Literature: 5

Maths (foundation): 4

Media: 3

Design and Technology: Textiles: 1

History: 4

Performing Arts: Merit

As you can tell, I passed a few, but not exactly monumental. After getting back these results in January, I began really putting the work in and thankfully, it paid off. My results in August 2020 were as follows:

Not only did I pass everything with a high pass, but I majorly surpassed my expectations with all the grades I got! In particular, I didn’t just get a distinction in Performing Arts, but instead a distinction* – the highest grade you can get!

Even though the results are clearly not by any stretch of the imagination amazing, considering my mental health was not amazing and I struggled lots with focusing and trauma. If I can do something like this while struggling, imagine what my A Level results will be like, when I’m passionate about a subject and I’ve left behind all the toxicity!

If anyone’s about to take their GCSEs, my advice would be, follow the deadlines, work hard on coursework, revise a fair amount, and make sure you understand the work! Ask questions and, as aforementioned, stick to the deadlines! I have lots more tips and tricks on my school page. There, I talk about focus, mental health and information about revision I wish I knew! I hope it’s helpful to you and I hope you enjoyed this article! I know I’ve been messing up the 30 Day Writing Order, but by the end of August, there will be 30 posts out, just maybe two in one day. Sorry for any inconvenience caused, all the best, love you all!

xo baby, Tati xoxo

My Sixteenth Birthday!

Finally, after many months of waiting, I am sixteen! I feel like I’ve just levelled up in the game of life, or evolved as a Pokemon. My XP is heightened, and I have gained new skills and I am more powerful than before. Of course, all of that is total bs, but a girl can dream!

I woke up very early – early for me at least: 7:40am. I opened my presents (I was honestly spoilt rotten and I cannot say thank you enough!)

I got ready at around 11am, I had a long bath; using the Spa Pamper Collection from Calcot Spa which I got for my birthday and I am obsessed with! I felt like a princess just bathing with bubbles galore. After that, I began sorting out my outfit, my makeup, all that jazz. My outfit and where you can get it from is all below so feel free to check it out and steal my look!

From Top-to-Toe: Snake Necklace from Lovisa, bodysuit and shorts both from New Look, rings all from Lovisa, nails from Primark in the shade “toasted” and thigh high boots from Asos.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get many photos of my makeup, but I will keep looking to see what I can find!


For the rest of the morning, I helped (and by helped I mean watched) my Dad turn our garden into something which looked like it had come straight out of Pinterest!

Due to the fact I didn’t actually get any photos of the gazebo clean, here’s one with me and a few of my friends from the end of the evening, ft the debris that was the food we ate.

Fairy lights from Homebase, Gazebo from Lidl, Balloons from Amazon and cups from Flying Tiger.


All in all, it was an amazing day and I want to thank everyone who made it so special❀️

Random Image Search

I have a lot of things on the agenda today, so I’m going to try go through them all as fast as I can but with enough detail. This article is a bit all over the place – as many of them have been this month – so allow it please! I’m splitting this post into three different sections, as none of this really flows all together. We’re going to start with some general announcements, updates, as we usually do on the here at Totally Tatiana. I say we, like it’s not just me orchestrating the entire blog here. Then, it’ll be the content you’re actually here for and finally some important announcements and information about the future of this blog. I hope this all makes sense!

First of all, it’s my birthday today! I am finally legal! Very exciting stuff! I’m planning some birthday-related articles which should be published before September – but please don’t hold me to that!! I might just post them as and when.


While I was thinking about what word to use, I looked to my left and I saw my newest addition to the random crap I buy when I’m out: a plush pig with a tutu.

this is Jezebel Piggerbelle – he is my new baby and I love him a lot.

Due to the fact that Jezebel is a tutu-wearing pig, I decided my random word would be ballet. I followed the rules and was given this photo:

According to Pinterest, this is Liza Chertikhina – a Russian ballerina from the Bolshoi Ballet Academy. I love ballet, I danced for a decade and I loved every minute of it. Whenever I have to choreograph dances for performing arts I always make sure to incorporate either contemporary dance or ballet into my choreo.

Truthfully, I kind of wish I could do that but I know I am the opposite of flexible so my talents are quite limited. Sad times. However, I think I’m going to try practice and work on doing the splits. This woman is also on pointe which is something I used to dream of doing. It’s kind of sad because it feels like I’ve given up on my dream of being a prima ballerina but I am moving onwards and upwards which is exciting stuff!

Sorry this was so sort, I don’t really know what to write about.


Finally, some overall updates. Just general information and things.

As you all know, I have done the 30-day writing challenge throughout August and as fun as it has been, I’ve been finding it slightly stressful. I am a massive perfectionist and I’ve been adding loads of unneeded pressure on myself. This has also taken a lot more time than I thought it would and while I was meant to be having a blog break this August, I’ve ended up working harder than ever. It’s currently the 22nd August and I thought I’d be long done but I am so so close! After this month, I’m going to go back to usual casual blog posts. I’m planning to write either one article a fortnight or one article a week – it depends how busy I am with Sixth Form. These posts will be high quality – that’s the Totally Tati guarantee.

That’s an update on my blog, I hope that this makes sense! If you enjoyed this then please like, it means the world to me πŸ₯°

xo baby, Tati xoxo

Hard Lessons

As I’ve worked my way through secondary school, I’ve learnt plenty of things the hard way. But I think the hardest thing I’ve learnt is that life isn’t a fairy tale and some people are just evil.

I like to see the best in people. However, people aren’t always great.

When you’re younger, you’re told fairy tales about how the mighty prince defeats the evil witch and saves the princess. However, when you get older, the like between good vs evil becomes gradually more blurred and that person you thought was your knight in shining armour could actually be a heartless witch in disguise.


The whole idea of good vs evil is something that really fascinates me. Are you born evil or are you raised that way? Can an evil person have a redemption arc? I’m in the process of researching for a properly science style article about the nature v nurture debate and how it can impact a person. That should be published next month at some point so follow my blog if you want to check that out!


Back onto topic, when I was younger, I dreamt of someone sweeping me off my feet and love at first sight and all that soppy crap. Now I’m older, I’ve finally started to realise that the world isn’t all blue skies, sunshine’s, and tan lines.

I don’t know when I got so cynical, but it was most likely after I got sexually assaulted for the first time. [I’m sorry, that was so blunt, I just don’t know how else to word it]. That was a turning point in my life. Yes, my short 15-year-long life. I realised that evil isn’t just confined to the pages of a book I read when I was five; but instead it’s a real thing, prowling, lurking around every corner, ready to jump out like a figment of your worst imagination.

So, life isn’t a fairy tale. It took me a long time to accept that, longer than I’d like to admit. However, now, I like to think that life is more of a comic book, and I’m Wonder Woman or something and I fight for justice while battling evil and looking hella good along the way. And, I’m okay with that. It’s better to be the damsel in distress who can handle it than the damsel in distress who’s weak and defeated.

As I always say, they may have tried to break me, but they forget I’m unbreakable.


Honestly, this isn’t my proudest work, but out of all the drafts I made for this article (trust me, there were loads), I liked this one the most. If you did enjoy this though, please like it, it’ll mean the world to me!

A Letter to Past Me

I have actually already done an article like this! But, instead of writing to my Future Self, I have decided to write a letter to my past self, six years ago, when I was 10 years old. Look at me go, linking stuff together!


Dear past Tati,

You’re about to go into secondary school this year! I know, you’re terrified of losing friendships and things, but trust me, for every shitty friend you lose, you’ll gain am amazing friend who will always support you through thick and thin.

I won’t lie to you, secondary school is tough. There will definitely be multiple moments where you’re ready to give up and just throw your future away. Don’t do that! Your future looks so bright and you got this.

You’ll explore and find passions you didn’t even know you had, you’ll learn so many new wonderful things, just make sure to take everything in and stay calm.

I know you love jumping into things head first, but try avoid it. Think things through and consider logical reasons to avoid doing something stupid.

Throughout school, you’ll find your voice. It’s a horrible journey to get there, but as soon as you do, you’ll be ready for whatever life throws at you.

You’re a tough cookie Tati. People have tried to break you before, but you’ll forever get up again and continue fighting and you’ll become completely unbreakable. As Legally Blonde’s Brooke Windom says: “what doesn’t kill us makes us hotter!” which is true, at least for your hair.

Don’t worry about your hair, just be warned that at the start of year nine you made a choice. Your hair is fine now though!

You can also do makeup, which makes you feel like the boss ass bitch which you are.

You’ll find yourself Tati, I do promise you that much.

Love yourself and give yourself more credit πŸ™‚

Fifteen (almost sixteen) year old Tati xxx

10 Random Songs

I’m almost positive that this will expose my bizarre music taste, but oh well! Please don’t judge me too much ~ I will explain the slightly more questionable songs, rest assured!

1. betty – Taylor Swift

A wholesome song with a wholesome message with some not-so-wholesome words. Listen to folklore it’s amazing.

2. CALI SUPERBLOOM – push baby

I love push baby sO MUCH. There songs are perfect as you can both vibe and relate to them and the music video for this song… *mwah* magnifique

3. Don’t Just Stand There Do Something – Kaiser Chiefs

No explanation needed 😜

4. London Boy – Taylor Swift

Okay, maybe, just maybe I have an obsession with a certain pop goddess, but can you really blame me?!

5. Crazy – Gnarls Barkley

Just thinking about this song makes me casually bop my head up and down, of course it’s on my phone!

6. Mamma Mia – ABBA

I am aware I have an eclectic taste in tunes. Doesn’t mean I can’t love ABBA!

7. Land of Lola – Kinky Boots

I’m a Performing Arts student who dreams of playing Lauren in Kinky Boots, did you really expect anything else?!

8. Killer Queen – Queen

Honestly, unpopular opinion, my all time favourite Queen song. I love the historical links and mmm it’s catchy. Don’t forget the harmonies!! Whenever I listen to the “she’ll absolutely drive you wi-ild” part, I’m almost certain that part of my soul goes to heaven.

9. Gangsta’s Paradise – Coolio

What a bop. That’s all.

10. She’s So Lovely – Scouting For Girls

Awee my childhood!! I used to sing this song all the time! I still love Scouting For Girls now so it’s nice that nothing has changed πŸ™‚ Old habits die hard, what can I say? And good bands never die, this band is no exception!


At the time I’m writing this. I’m 30 followers away from reaching 100 on this blog! If I’m able to get those last 30 people to follow my blog before I turn 16, I will be over the moon. So please, if you haven’t already, like this article and follow my blog! It means the absolute world to me and I’ll feel like I’m making a difference.

I love you all, thank you for reading and I’ll see you tomorrow πŸ™‚

Three Lessons I Want My Children To Learn From Me

I like this topic! It’s quite different but it’s a thinker and I’ve worked out exactly what I want my kids to learn. I don’t really want kids, but if I ever change my mind, this is what they need to know. I could have a few stupidly obvious things, but I’ve decided on three different things that I’ve learnt throughout the years. God, I say years like I’m old, I’m still not 16 yet! Yikes. Anyway… on with it!

1. Life’s not fair, get used to it.

A quote pulled directly from my Dad’s getting-your-daughter-to-shut-up-dictionary. Ever since I can remember, if I’ve ever complained about something pretty miniscule, my Dad would say that phrase. When I was younger, I always thought it was really mean, but now I’m older [yep, still acting like I’m super old. This will almost definitely be a reoccurring theme], and (a smidge) wiser, I realised it’s actually true. Life sucks, man. Either you can moan and groan at every single small issue, or you can shut up and strive on. The only way for unimportant things to leave you alone, is to walk around them in your path of life. Get used to the small annoyances in life so you can face them all head on when you’re ready.

Slight side-note, but please appriciate that ever since these imaginary kids have appeared, I am acting like I’m some sort of a prophet/God. Is this what having kids does to you? Wow, I have so many questions!

2. Aspire for success, and don’t accept anything less.

Kind of a cute story behind this one. I was talking to someone about how shitty all my ex boyfriends were and he said this to me. Even though he meant it about partners, I feel like this applies to pretty much anything. I just love the idea of aiming high and achieving it, and I feel like these “words of wisdom” pretty much mean that you should never rest on your laurels, no matter how much easier that may be. You were bought here to achieve great things, so it’s only fair that you at least try.

3. Never shut up. It’ll be your greatest quality.

In my lifetime I have been called almost every slur in the book. All because I stand up for what I believe in. Make sure that if you believe in something so strongly, you will go to the ends of the earth to get your voice heard. As you grow older, your voice will merely become louder and those who try silence you are just jealous. Be proud of yourself, you’ve made it this far πŸ™‚

My Three Celebrity Crushes

This is an interesting topic! I feel like it says a lot about me because I didn’t even really think about this post, I just thought of my top three celeb crushes and boom day 20 is all done! Simples!

  1. Paul Rudd

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a man who has never aged in his life. I’m 90% certain that he was the inspiration for The Picture of Dorian Gray. Just look at this man! He’s 53 and he looks like he’s in his late 30s. He needs to drop the skincare routine ASAP.

2. Mathew Baynton

You may not recognise the name, but if you were born in the 2000’s you’ll know this mans gorgeous face. He was on my favourite CBBC show, Horrible Histories, a show I would give my right leg to star on. This man is also a feminist icon and I have so much respect for his talents, particularly his singing on Horrible Histories. Not to flex or anything, but I know all the words to the Dick Turpin Highway Man Song and I’ve mastered the Charles II’s King of Bling song also. Baynton is my childhood, and watching him in a curly wig, dancing in a historical building is part of what has shaped me to be who I am today.

3. John Krasinski

Who doesn’t adore Jim from The Office? Look at this insanely talented man. Honestly, just his acting credentials take my breath away, but then you see this mans face. Okay, that may have been too far, but him and Emily Blunt are the power couple of my dreams. All I need in life is to find a John Krasinski and I will be very happy.

Looking back over my little list, I realise I may have accidentally given myself a type… I didn’t mean to! These are just three unproblematic, attractive men who I both respect and want to meet πŸ™‚